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I Wake Up Even When I’m Not Done Sleeping

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Last night was one of those nights when I kept waking up. I couldn’t stay asleep. I finally woke up just after 6am an ungodly hour of the day for me. I’ll probably go outside and lie down on the lounge chair with a book and end up falling asleep in the sun and then I’ll really be groggy for the rest of the day!

At the many Amway meetings I attended the cult leader speaking to the group would say something to the effect of “wouldn’t it be great to wake up in the morning when you’re done sleeping”. I know I heard our sack of shit Platinum said that at every Scamway meeting that his wife gets up once she’s done sleeping. Sounds a little irresponsible when you have school age children. Their kids were teenagers - a boy and a girl - I think about 13 and 14 at the time. Does mom not want to make sure the kids are getting themselves out of bed on time, eating a decent breakfast, packing a lunch, and making sure they get out the door? Would Platinum dad be doing all this? Unlikely. That asshole is a male chauvinist pig and childcare he would put under the category of “woman’s work”. In which case his wife is very likely getting out of bed when the sack of shit shakes her awake and says “you’re done sleeping. Get up now! I want my fucking breakfast!”

The main reason the Platinum says his wife gets out of bed when she’s done sleeping is to sneer at the downline who have jobs and set their alarm clock daily and get out of bed in time to get to work.

“Wake up when you’re done sleeping” is something I have a hard time getting my head wrapped around. First off most parents who have school age children don’t laze around in bed and get up when they’re “done sleeping”. Maybe - and that’s a big maybe depending on how mature and responsible the kid is - once the kid is a junior or senior and is capable of getting themselves out of bed on time, dressed, eat breakfast and off to school. I know I was just as likely to play hooky as go to school. Just because your kid goes out the door doesn’t mean they don’t have better things to do for the day than go to school. Parents who have younger children need to get them out of bed, dressed, prepare breakfast, fix a lunch bag, and walk them to school unless there are older siblings who can walk with the younger child. Its my guess that most stay at home parents wake up by at least 7am. They probably don’t go back to bed once everyone is out the door either.

Unless of course you’re a lazy ass IBO who is following the upline’s advice about not getting out of bed until you’re done sleeping.

Unlike what the Amway assholes say about wouldn’t it be nice not to have to wake up to an alarm clock every morning I very rarely set my alarm clock. If I set my alarm its because I have somewhere to be early. Alarm clock or not I’d say that I very rarely wake up when I’m “done sleeping”. Like today for example! I ain’t done sleeping yet! So I’m working on a blog post!

Just because Platinums and Diamonds praise the value of staying in bed until you’re “done sleeping” doesn’t mean its something everyone aspires to do and not something that is necessarily practical. I guess none of them ever heard of Benjamin Franklin and “early to bed early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise”.

I wouldn’t say that I necessarily go to bed early though since we’re no longer in Amway I’m able to get to bed before midnight. Does it make me healthy waking up early? When I get up I walk the dog, have something light to eat, and then I go to the Y to swim or do an exercise class. Healthy enough I suppose. Or healthier than lying around in bed until I’m “done sleeping”.

Let’s compare that to an Amway IBO. Say the lazy bastard hauls ass out of bed around noon. They go to the kitchen to prepare a meal of an XS energy drink, food bar, and vitamins. Next will probably be checking email, text messages, and making lots of phone calls. Next thing its late in the afternoon and the laundry and housecleaning aren’t done. What about yard work? When was the last time the lawn was mowed or the garden weeded? Who’s got time for that? Now its time for counselling with downline because they’re starting to get off work now and then the 8pm board plan meeting and the night owl. Arrive back home around 2am and do it all over again the next day.

Lying around in bed is a waste of time to many people. I’ve always gone with the philosophy that the quicker I can get things done the quicker I can relax. Even though I can lay around in bed until noon if I wanted I don’t do it because the day is getting away from me.

Waking up when I’m done sleeping does not work for me.

Neither does waking up when I’m not done sleeping!

But I still press on.

At least I’m not an Amway asshole who lies around in bed half the day because of a feeling of entitlement because that’s what the upline tells them to aspire to - get up when they’re done sleeping.

And those Amway fuckers call us lazy!




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